The Trials of Trusting God

In this episode of Beyond the Benediction, Zauria Derico shares her journey of trusting God through trials. She talks about her battle with cancer and how she had to come to terms with God's sovereignty and His plan for her life. Zauria emphasizes the importance of faith and accepting God's plan, even when it doesn't align with our desires. She also highlights the significance of community and the support she received from her family and friends. Zauria encourages young people to have fun and enjoy life as believers, and to trust in God's love and goodness.

Transcript

Kevin (00:00.258)
All right, welcome again to another episode of Beyond the Benedictine where we deal with the deficits in discipleship. I'm your host, Kevin Tumor, and this is one of my most favorite people on the planet. This is my girl. This is my heart. This is my sweetie. I love her so much. One of my nieces. We're not related by physical blood, but we're related by the blood of Jesus. Amen, this is my girl. So I wanted her to introduce herself and tell us a little bit about

Tell everybody about yourself.

Zauria Derico (00:32.456)
Oh hi everybody my name is Zari Derigo. I am 27 years old. Derigo meaning married happily married.

Kevin (00:40.815)
Uh, uh, show that ring, oh, show that ring, oh.

Zauria Derico (00:45.204)
happily married to Edwin Derrick O'Jr. That is the love of my life. I am located in Miami, Florida, and it is a pleasure to be speaking to you and to everyone that's gonna be listening to our show today.

Kevin (01:02.802)
Absolutely, absolutely. And we're pleased to have you. And like I said, this is a treat. I only think I just wish I was there in person, but hopefully we'll get together in person soon. So always ask this question for all my guests. So real quick, whatever comes to mind, what is something about the faith, about God, about church, whatever it is that you used to believe was true, but as you grew and you were in ritual, you was like, wait a minute, that's not really the case. Actually, it's really this instead of this. Tell us something.

Zauria Derico (01:32.784)
So that thing for me would be understanding God's sovereignty. On February 27, 2020, I started with this... I'm sorry, so after my chorale practice, I noticed like a weird...

feeling in my sinus. And I remember my mom taking me to the hospital and they misdiagnosed me. They thought it was sinusitis. So the past month I've been getting treatments to help with it, but it was just getting worse. And then now it was affecting my eye.

and this was my senior year in college and I'm just like this is just a really bad time right now. I have too many things going on. I'm trying to pass my classes and do whatever this issue is and it's not helping. And a month later my dad suggested that I go to Bascom Palmer once they did the biopsy.

And the scans, they realized, oh, this is not a sinusitis. This is a rare cancer that we're dealing with. And we need to start treatment right away. And I just never thought that I would be dealing with this type of ailment.

I've had loved ones that have survived the unfortunate past of cancer, but thankfully my parents nor my siblings have experienced it, but I didn't think it was going to be Zaria and I actually thought, like, God, am I going to die? Like what is happening here? And when we say yes to God, we don't know what that yes comes with, right? And we say things like, oh, um.

Zauria Derico (03:20.432)
I didn't ask for this, but it's like, you said yes. And no matter what that came with, you said yes to God. And it's a hard pill to swallow. Because I know it was a hard pill for me to swallow because I just never thought this would be me. And just being able to finally speak on this journey and expressing the goodness of God while suffering.

and how suffering is a way that we connect with Christ because He has suffered for our sake. So now we must partake in that suffering. So that just really helped me to understand that God's plan may be something that I just never thought would be in the plans but there's a bigger picture here and also faith.

I remember before they gave me the news about it being cancer, I thought maybe I just pray hard enough, whatever is going on, it'll just go away, but it never did.

So faith doesn't always mean that I'm going to get what I prayed for. Sometimes it does, but not in the package that you thought was going to be in. Or sometimes you do give it to pray for, but it's a process. Or he has a different plan. So just accepting.

what his plan is for your life. So the faith should not be in the outcome that we want. The faith should just mainly be in God and his capabilities. And that whatever his plans, whatever his plans are, what that consists with, we have to trust and believe that he has our best interests at heart.

Kevin (05:06.55)
Wow. Such an awesome and wise, the wisdom beyond your years and just having that perspective because there are people who go through things not even on the level that you're experiencing and they panic and they break down and they don't... Their trust in God wanes. But in your case, and of course, again, we've known each other for so long. I'm going to tell my age. I've known her since she was this little. So I've got to give my age a little bit, but we've known each other for so long.

her grow and develop into such a beautiful young lady and the beauty has not changed she's still just as beautiful still just as vibrant still the Zari that I remember and I love and but now she's even more beautiful because now I see the light of Christ in her that's shining so vibrantly and that answer you gave trust me

That's encouraging for me and for all of us who are watching this episode, because like you said, we lose sight of the fact that God does have a plan. His plan isn't always comfortable. This plan does not conform to what we desire. The scripture says, well, there's a cliche that man plans and God laughs. He laughs at the plans of what we think is gonna happen in our lives, but.

Zauria Derico (06:09.428)
Yeah.

Zauria Derico (06:17.361)
Oh.

Kevin (06:20.866)
for you to have such a positive outlook about things and still have that light is so encouraging. And I'm just so proud of you. So now let's talk about those moments when you have had, cause you're upbeat and you have faith, but let's be real, we all have those moments where you're not feeling upbeat, you're not feeling the best, you're not optimistic. How do you maintain, how do you stay focused in those moments when...

your faith might be running a little low.

Zauria Derico (06:52.42)
Wow, I've had a lot of those moments in my journey and to be transparent there were two times in my journey where I contemplated suicide because I'm like I Lord here's one we occur as for two three

four reoccurrences. Like, God, like this is just not, this just, this can't be the plan. So I really wanted to take my life, but I'm so thankful for my family. Not.

only my family but people in the church, my friends that didn't just give me worldly advice but gave me sound godly counsel on how to get through it. Community is so important because when you don't have the strength it's a blessing to have people in your corner that's able to lift you up when you're down.

Zauria Derico (07:52.156)
just trusting that what I'm going through right now is bigger and that this is not supposed to take my life. But this is something that's going to not just help me as a person, but somebody else down the line. And I don't know who that person may be. I may meet it or I may never meet them. But what I've also seen is creatures that suffer, when we go through things, it's also to comfort others too.

and I just never thought I would be using this magnitude but just trusting that.

in spite of what chemotherapies I have to do, the radiations or even the hospital scares of my amnesis was very low and the really bad infections that God is still going to sustain me. And even in this affliction it has never spread throughout my body and that could have happened because our coma is a very tricky cancer and now everybody make it through the first year.

Kevin (08:55.15)
Mm-hmm.

Zauria Derico (08:58.876)
for the first six months of treatment. But God has sustained me. So just finding the things to be grateful for in spite of what I'm going through, that also helps me to get through it.

Kevin (09:22.963)
Absolutely. Wow. What an awesome answer. And the faith to hold on to your faith has to be the foundation. Someone like yourself, going through something even not as big, that's the lesson for all of us is that you have to have, that's in my shirt, it says it, faith. You have to have faith, the trust that even though I don't understand what's going on, I know that God is good. In those moments, and like you said it so well,

You gotta have that community and you have that family. You have the tribe to help you because all of us, no matter how much we love the Lord and trust God, we have those moments where we're like, okay, God, what's going on? What are you doing? I don't understand. Why does it have to be this way? Do I have to go through this? Do I have to endure this? And you have to have those people around you and I'm so thankful.

that God has surrounded you with a tribe, of course I'm in that tribe too, you know, I love you. You know, I'm in that tribe as well. But just to be able to know that he's there. And I think sometimes we have to have those reminders that yes, I'm still with you. That yes, it may be difficult, but I have never left. The scripture says, I will never leave you nor forsake you. So, but it's good to see someone out, especially at your age, being 27 and still being relatively young.

Zauria Derico (10:34.004)
Thanks for watching!

Kevin (10:42.414)
What is something that you would say, especially going through what you're going through and you're carrying it so well? What would you say to someone, what can we do to motivate other young people to have the same level of faith that you have? What can we do to get them to see God the way you do?

Zauria Derico (11:01.789)
I would say just because God doesn't does everything that you will like for him to do it doesn't mean he doesn't love you.

and that in this walk you may deal with some disappointments. Not because God isn't capable of doing the things that you believe in Him for, but there is a path that He has for you and it's bigger than what you see right now. And it's okay to not be okay. It's okay to be truthful with God and say, hey.

this situation is really bringing me down. I'm having these thoughts. Just being honest with God, because we think we have to hide all we really feel. God already knows. Just speak on it. Be honest with him. And whether he speaks to you directly or sends a video or a person to encourage you, but just allow God to lead you with his plans for your life. And it's easier said than done.

But once we see the why, we're going to give praise to God for that. Because in spite of it, He's still good. He's still good.

Kevin (12:21.346)
Wow, awesome, awesome. I'm just sitting here just amazed at your level of maturity, your level of wisdom, and level of just the peace that you have about this thing. It's just so amazing and inspiring. So now, what are some things that you're doing now? Because we know that God is a healer. We believe in God, has great things for you. We know that, as you said,

This is bigger than you. So what are some things that you're doing now that keeps you upbeat? What are some things that you do to make you smile, to keep you happy, to keep you going? Tell us some good things that God is doing to keep you, keep that beautiful smile on your face. What are some things that you do to keep smiling?

Zauria Derico (13:00.684)
Hmm. But one of the things is dressing up. Once I realized I don't have to look like what I'm going through, and that's something that my mother and my husband encouraged me. Even when I was in the clinic, I'll always, you know, dress down because yes, I'm trying to be comfortable, but they said, you know, Zara, you can still look decent, no? So once I got to my set of

Kevin (13:16.578)
Hmm.

Zauria Derico (13:28.764)
dressing up, even out in public, just, you know, do the lashes or, you know, it makes me feel good about myself. It makes me feel normal. And having, you know, having fun with my husband, like whether it be doing movie night or getting ice cream or things like that, or I feel like, oh, hey babe, can you buy this for me? You know, little stuff like that. That just really encourages me.

and just spending time with friends, you know, when my immune system was doing good, you know, going out with them, and spending time with family and my in-laws. I love them so much. And they've also experienced loved ones in their family bound with cancer. So they knew exactly what to do to support me. So just having a strong community and them just reminding me, Zahra, you're not a birdie.

Like you're not a burden. If you need anything, just let us know we're here for you. If you just need to call us and bid, we're here for you, we love you. And even enjoying things like SpongeBob. I love SpongeBob. Sometimes my mom will get me like the SpongeBob shirts or even just watching the show. Like that just, that makes me happy. Like that's my happy place right there.

Kevin (14:53.254)
I remember that. I remember. Ha ha ha.

Zauria Derico (14:58.54)
I'm like, yes, I'm a functioning adult, but I love my spongebob and no one gets to criticize my joy. As long as it's spiritually and morally correct, I'm gonna have a good time. So, I love me some spongebob now. So those are just a few things that keeps me uplifted.

Kevin (15:02.594)
Hehehehehehe

Zauria Derico (15:25.157)
Oh, and another thing.

Kevin (15:25.786)
Wow, that's awesome. And I remember from way back, he was always a SpongeBob. So he, go ahead, go ahead.

Zauria Derico (15:32.28)
Right. Another thing too is when people started supporting me through GoFundMe and they will send the encouraging messages, that also helped me. Even when I post my health updates on social media and just all the feedback that were just so positive encouraging me to keep the faith into

Trust in God, those are things that really kept me, especially the days when I was down, and they didn't even know, but that message just came right on time. I'm like, that's the God thing right there. So just enjoying those parts of sunshine and just receiving love from people, that's also kept me going.

Kevin (16:28.706)
That's awesome. That's awesome. That's so awesome. And I'm so, so thankful to see again, your disposition is so encouraging. Every time I go online, I see you on Facebook and you're posting things. I see you and you're dressed up, you're doing your thing. It's so encouraging. You know, and let me just say this is not part of the episode, but, you know, we haven't seen each other in, it's been almost, almost four years.

since I left Florida and you have not experienced a hug until you got a Zaria hug. Her hugs are like magic. So if you have, so those who know Zaria know it's not like a Zaria hug, nothing like a Zaria hug. I want a virtual hug right now from Zaria. But yeah, but so now I know we don't have a lot of time. So what are some things

Zauria Derico (16:55.252)
Thank you.

Zauria Derico (17:04.408)
I'm almost done with that.

Kevin (17:23.266)
that you would say are important, or you would say it's just almost mandatory as a Christian, your age, your condition notwithstanding, if you were trying to tell, so if I was 20 something, I wish I was. If I was still 20 something, and I'm coming to another 20 something that says, you know what, I'm thinking about becoming a Christian. But I'm not sure, because...

Zauria Derico (17:36.436)
you

Kevin (17:49.558)
You know, I'm still young and I want to go out and do my thing. And maybe I'll get become a Christian. What would you say to us that person who is still not sure in their 20s that this Christianity thing is for them?

Zauria Derico (18:02.993)
I think the misconception is people think that you can't be a believer and have fun. Like you don't have to be you know drunk or to you know smoke to have a good time. You can have wholesome fun like going to Starbucks or to the beach or doing some water activities. Like there are other ways that you can have fun as a believer.

It's cool to love Jesus. Like, Jesus is not for the old, it's for the young. Jesus is for everybody. So once people really have that understanding, especially people in my age group, and see positive examples of that, that will help draw people in.

Kevin (18:52.838)
Wow, that's good, that's good. Love that, love that. So do you have any, no, do you have any questions? I know we talked about it before. Any questions for me? I like to open it up for people, you know, I always like to do a little bit of teaching, you know, I can't help it. So any questions or things that, you know, scripture, church, whatever, that I can answer by all means, you know, let's have it, let's have a little rap session. Any questions you have for me?

Zauria Derico (19:23.086)
Have you ever been in a season of your life where you know that you're being called to a higher level of faith in a dire situation and it's scary? Like how deep, how did you get through that?

Kevin (19:40.818)
Wow, yes. The answer is yes. Definitely yes. Two things. One, that's where your foundation and your faith comes to play because your foundation coupled with your experience with God because you know God and you know he's good and you know that whatever he does for you is for your good. So your first thing you say, okay, Lord, if you call me to this, I know that you're good and I know you're going to be with me.

And the second thing is now you have to ask God, now you, I can't do this on my own. Yes, you called me to this up next level of faith. You got to get me there. I can't get there on my own. So if you want me here, you have to take me by the hand, literally and figuratively and get me there. And like you said, it is scary because most of the time he's taking you to a place.

Zauria Derico (20:20.264)
Thank you.

Zauria Derico (20:27.665)
Yes.

Kevin (20:34.21)
that's unfamiliar and you're doing something that you aren't comfortable or used to doing or not experienced in doing. So wait a minute, this is what Zaria does. Zaria doesn't do this. You want me to do what? No, that's not in my expertise. It's not in my level of knowledge, but God said, no, this is what I called you to do. So it is terrifying, but at the same time, Zaria is also exciting.

Zauria Derico (20:41.204)
Oh.

Zauria Derico (20:56.284)
Thanks for watching!

Kevin (21:02.582)
because now you get to see what God can do through you. And that way he gets all the credit. Cause you can't say, well, Kevin likes to teach. So that's why I'm a teacher. No, no, you pick, you do something that you can't do. You need his help. And when it works, man, if it weren't for the Lord, I couldn't have did it. I couldn't have made it through. I couldn't have gotten to this next level. So it is scary.

Zauria Derico (21:06.767)
Yeah.

Zauria Derico (21:22.519)
you

Zauria Derico (21:26.514)
you

Kevin (21:28.79)
but it is also exciting and you have to look at, as you said earlier, big picture. God is taking me here and it's gonna be something great and I'm gonna be so much better for it, even though it may not feel like it in the interim, but I know God's character and I know God is gonna get me there and it's gonna be good.

Hope I answered your question.

Zauria Derico (21:51.005)
Thank you, I loved your answer. That was beautiful. Thank you. I have those moments in this journey I'm just so... Um... Hmm... But I love how you answered that and it's actually encouraging for me right now as we're speaking so I thank you for that.

Kevin (22:02.072)
Of course, of course, of course.

Kevin (22:13.143)
Hehehe

Zauria Derico (22:19.1)
there is due.

Kevin (22:24.862)
Absolutely. If any, I mean, because you've already been encouraging me. I think I told you this off of the show, but I mean, you're such an amazing, motivating person. Your character, your demeanor, your disposition, you know, you're just, you just, like I said, I feel like

I'm definitely like an uncle. I feel like I'm so proud of you just to see the light of the Lord. I saw it when we were younger, when we were running around, but now to see it come full circle, I believe God is, oh man, He's going to do so much great things for you, through you. I just can't wait for it all to manifest. I'm just so thankful that He's working in you. He's working through you.

I'm honored to have you on the show. I'm honored to have you. I'm so thankful you said yes. Thankful you said yes. But let me say.

Zauria Derico (23:12.651)
I'm already being chosen. Oh my gosh, like I've never done this before. I was like, me? Like I just, I just never thought me. Like I just, me? Me and Joseph? Me interview? Now's the time?

Kevin (23:26.683)
Hehehehehehe

Zauria Derico (23:33.232)
wow so it's truly an honor and I'm just so thankful for this moment. I really am. Because I second guess myself a lot I'm like Lord am I even in the place to even speak? I have my low moments am I even worthy? But it shows me that in spite of the ups and downs that I've gone through I'm still called. That's not taken away from me. That just makes me real.

Kevin (23:56.545)
Wow. Yes you are.

Zauria Derico (24:05.752)
So I thank you for being chosen for this.

Kevin (24:06.906)
Absolutely. And this is just the first. This is the first.

Zauria Derico (24:16.956)
Hmm, oh! Sorry.

Kevin (24:21.954)
But this is the first of many. I mean, you're on this show for the first time, but this is gonna be, there are gonna be many more. There are gonna be many more. God's going to do great things through you. And there are so many people that are gonna be blessed by you and again, you're such an awesome, awesome inspiration. But real quick, we wanna wrap up, cause I know we probably pressed for time. And I wanna make sure that, we don't get you kicked out of where you at.

I don't want you to get kicked out. Give us just some last thoughts, encouragements, just some things that you, in your walk, again, the title of the episode that you're going to see is going to be called, you know, trusting God through the trials. What are some last minute or last words you can say about helping others?

to as they see you trusting God and trials, what can you say is the last little motivation to get them to continue to trust God through their trials?

Zauria Derico (25:27.131)
What has helped me is my experiences. How every time I was admitted in the hospital, I was blessed enough to come home. Not everybody comes home. And just thinking back on

the things that God has done for me, in my health and my finances, how even in the circumstances like I've never lacked, I was always taken care of. So just thinking about the things that God has done for that to be an encouragement. And also not being afraid to ask for help. Sometimes we get used to bothering things in because we don't want to be burdened. Like something that I've...

felt but we're actually called to carry each other's burdens. That's scripture. When a person is down we're called to help with them. When we are thrown we're family. It means family of less one another. That's what it's supposed to be like. And be honest with God. He already knows how you feel.

Kevin (26:23.522)
Hmm. That's good.

Zauria Derico (26:42.716)
and whatever way he chooses, allow him to minister to your heart because he's going to remind you in some kind of way that he loves you and that he never left you and that you're in a seed to the end. That's what I would say.

Kevin (27:06.442)
Wow. I want to ask you, I'll edit this out later. Are they ready to kick you out? Or do you got to give you some time? Where you are? Do you like anybody to kick you out?

Zauria Derico (27:18.576)
Let me see. I think so.

Kevin (27:26.472)
Okay.

Zauria Derico (27:28.862)
I said I'm sorry, the mall is pretty cool. Okay, thank you. You know when I spoke, we got the phone? Okay, how's it going? It's going good, thank you so much.

Kevin (27:33.566)
I heard him. I heard him.

Zauria Derico (27:40.197)
Oh

Kevin (27:43.474)
Okay, I heard him. I was trying to see if we could sneak a little bit more in, but I heard him. All right, so we're gonna go ahead and we're going to wrap up this week's episode. I wanna thank my girl, Zari Derico for being on. This won't be the last time we have her on. And again, keep her in prayer. We know that God's gonna do great things for her. This is the beginning of the journey and we believe God's gonna do great things for her.

Zauria Derico (28:08.148)
Thanks for watching.

Kevin (28:09.086)
So thank you guys for watching and listening. Make sure you like, share, subscribe to the YouTube page. I need some comments, comment to say how much you loved episode, how much you love Zaria. You ain't gotta talk about me, Kevin is whatever. But talk about Zaria, talk about how great she is. Talk about her in the comments. Amen. Well, thank you so much for watching and listening. Pray that episode blessed you. And as always, make sure your light shines brightest for the Lord Jesus Christ beyond the benediction. Until next time, be blessed.

Zauria Derico (28:24.308)
Thanks for watching!